I don’t open my windows… I don’t allow those nasty buggers into my room. However, the rest of my family is not quite as careful about this… now, I sit here - with welts on my legs and back and behind my knees where mosquitos sucked mah blooooood.

Oh, and one right below my thumb joint. That sucks.

So… two entries in one night, huh? What’s up with me? Nothing. I just have time and don’t have to be up early for work. And here I sit.

I am wondering if my friend M. (who married a Brit and is living in the UK and who, I recently found out, is pregnant!) would be into something like this pregnancy belly casting kit. I think she would - she’d paint it and make it all pretty and stuff. She’s coming to the States for a visit in August, so I’d like to have a gift or two for her when she gets here. There are, of course, TONS of adorable “onesies” for infants these days… particularly at a little boutique I saw on the Upper West Side in Manhattan. I’ll be dog-sitting in Manhattan again in mid-July, so perhaps I’ll stop in and see if there’s one that suits my friend and her hubbie.

I also spent some time searching for couch alternatives online at stores other than Ikea. There are some, but I’ll pay out the arse in shipping since many of the affordable ones come from places with no brick-and-mortar equivalent from whence I could pick up the couch. However, ABC Carpet and Home has an outlet in Hackensack, NJ, which is within comfortable driving distance. I can check that out since I’ve seen their ads and seen their website, but I’ve not seen their actual goods in person. The style of the website appeals to me, so if their actual merchandise is in keeping with that, it might work. But I have NO clue what range of prices we’re looking at. It won’t hurt to check out an outlet store, though.

I also looked at the West Elm site (since I get their catalog but was unable to find a copy when I needed one today). West Elm is owned by Williams Sonoma, who also owns Pottery Barn. However, West Elm is the less expensive, “younger” and “funkier” kid cousin to Pottery Barn, so it’s more my speed in terms of $$$, though it’s not cheap.

Perhaps I could lobby for a house-warming gift in the shape of a couch from my family. Not the whole thing; they could just help me afford a nicer one. It’s an idea; I have everything else from my last apartment - like dishes, pots and pans, shelves, comfy seating, a microwave, toaster oven, silverware, knives, coffee/end tables, bedding and linens, DVD player, TV, computer, printer, scanner, and a plethora of other goodies.

Just not a couch. Or a dining room table. That I gave to my roommate since she needed it there and I had nowhere to put it.

OK. No need to get ahead of myself. Once I SAVE the money, FIND an apartment and HAVE somewhere to put these things, I can actually begin looking.

This “Don’t Know Much About History” book is rather interesting, by the way. It’s already passed the most important test: I read the preface/introduction in its entirety without getting bored or skipping anything, AND I learned something from reading that brief segment. Good times. Do check it out if you so desire.

Today I saw “The Devil Wears Prada” with my friend Elizabeth.

It was OK - started strong and then ended up being a bit too much of a morality tale for my taste. But Meryl Streep was great, and so was Miss Anne Hathaway. I think I am becoming a fan of that young star - she’s a Jersey girl, too, and is/was attending NYU. Yay, her! But she made the transition from things like “The Princess Diaries” series and “Ella Enchanted” (and I admit that I’ve seen all of them - and enjoyed them… esp. “Ella Enchanted”) to appearing topless in “Havoc” and “Brokeback Mountain.” She gets props for being kinda ballsy and also for having the same name as Shakespeare’s wife. Anne Hathaway’s cottage is a landmark… visit if you ever go to the UK. It’s interesting to see. Cool thatched roof action.

After the movie, Elizabeth and I went to Barnes and Noble and I bought a copy of “Don’t Know Much About History” - since I’ve often thought about it and - why not? U.S. history is one of my weaknesses. I mean, I’m not totally ignorant, but there are things I don’t know and I feel I should… even though the country is so young and all. Blah… these young nations thinking they know everything and have this world of experience behind them. Meh.

I was just looking at the craiglist Jersey page to check out apartments in the area. I might have to drive around a little to check out the areas before I go calling to make appointments to see places… and I think that if I set aside $2000 for a security deposit, I should be OK. If I can set aside $3000 to be ahead on the rent, that would be good too. So, these are the things in my mind… I just want to find a decent area somewhere near a train station. I found some 2 bedrooms (which would be dreamy - I could have a library AND a bedroom) but they were only affordable in questionably safe areas. Single chick who looks like she’s 15? I need to be in a more-or-less safe area, or else I’m pretty much asking for victimization of one kind or another (whether it’s being ripped off for little things or robbed.) Thankfully, I’m a little more savvy than that, and smarter (older?) than I look.

I think I may have to start - slowly but surely - packing up my books. Like in the coming weeks, even before I have a set date or an apartment or anything. That’s going to be an undertaking and what scares me the most about moving. Getting boxes for everything is going to be a problem. However, books are rigid and unbreakable, so until I get a couch, I can always pull a Paul Auster (like the protagonist in his novel, “Moon Palace”) and make furniture out of the boxes of books.

I don’t think I have a group of friends I could invite over to have a box-packing party… complete with pizza and sangria or something. Then again, I haven’t tried asking. Eh - it’s probably something I should do on my own so I can revisit and remember and perhaps set some books aside for donation or sale, since there are some I’ve forgotten I have and this most likely means I won’t need them in the coming years either.

In the process of searching for a link to a synopsis of “Moon Palace”, I came across this article from the Times-News in Idaho. Here’s an excerpt about storing/getting rid of books for bibliophiles:

Where to share your book bounty

For serious readers, throwing books away is unthinkable. But selling them or donating them to a good cause can soften the pain of parting.

•Libraries or schools often are happy to take books in good condition, usually to sell them to raise money for their own programs. Call before you schlep.
•You can hawk books on the Internet, although that involves packing and shipping; unless they’re valuable, it might be easier to unload them at a yard sale.
•Used-book stores are an option, though typically they pay just a fraction of list price (as little as 5 percent) or only issue credit.
•If all else fails, set up a giveaway table in your office or apartment building for sharing.

Provide a healthy environment

There is a right way and a wrong way to store books, says Don Williams, senior conservator at the Smithsonian Institution, who was consulted on preserving such museum treasures as Archie Bunker’s chair and Franklin Roosevelt’s desk.

“Think of paper as a dried vegetable. Paper, especially wood pulp paper, will change color and become brittle over time,” he says.

•Keep all books out of damp basements, hot attics and direct sunlight.
•Keep them away from plants because bugs like to nibble on pages and bookbinding glue.
•Reduce the stress on the spine and binding of large books by laying them on their sides (in deep shelves or on tabletops) rather than standing them upright.
•Use acid-free book boxes for long-term storage (available where home organizing products are sold); try to keep the humidity between 30 and 50 percent.

Oh. And Michael Bay is making a feature film: “Transformers”!!!! Here’s the link to the preview (which I saw at the beginning of the “Ultraviolet” DVD, actually). It’s live action - most likely with a helluva lot of CGI - and will feature the likes of Josh Duhamel (”Win a Date with Tad Hamilton”), Tyrese Gibson (model-turned-actor - “2 Fast 2 Furious”), and Shia LeBeouf (”Holes”, “Constantine”, and “Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle”). It’s unclear what will be going on with the story.

So you may have guessed that I had the day off from work. Yup. Tomorrow too. Then back to work on Wednesday for a short but intense week. I’m actually doing some work right now - I’m researching. In my pajamas. But it’s all kinds of good… I have an email composition window open and I’m pasting in any useful links I find so I can follow up with printing and reading at work on Wed.

I’m also watching Mel Brooks’ History of the World, Part 1. It’s always enjoyable, if offensive.

OK. So much for sleep. I found a fun game to play with Google, listed in this online version of a book called, “55 Ways to Have Fun with Google.” The title links you to the homepage where you can download it as a PDF or Word doc, or order it from Amazon.

The one that captured my interest was Egogoogling. Here’s the description from the book:

The act of searching for yourself is also known as “egogoogling.” Here’s a variant of it which can be a fun game. Enter your first name followed by the word “is” into Google, and put the search in quotes. For example, if your name is Susan, the search would look like this:
“susan is.”

Now in the search result snippets, you will learn a lot of things about you that you didn’t even know!

So, I did a search on “eva is.” Here are my results, which are incredibly entertaining since my name is an acronym (and I’m using that word correctly, thanks!) for various things.

Eva is inside her cat.
EVA is net operating profit minus an appropriate charge…
EVA is work done by an astronaut away from the Earth…
Eva is hot in black.
EVA is both intriguingly clever and maddeningly deceptive.
eva is not a slut im just jealous of her cuz you are so goregous
EVA IS 4 YEARS OLD TODAY!
Eva is what we in the industry like to call an OTS.
EVA is not difficult to calculate.
Eva is annoying.
Eva is probably a manipulative whore.
Eva is a normal person, who has something extraordinary to watch over her.
Eva is going to appear in Jessica Simpson’s new video for her song Public Affair.
EVA is to let European citizens participate in the cultural heritage of other countries, multilinguality being one of the obstacles to overcome.
EVA is a pro-market think-tank financed by the Finnish business community.
EVA is unique! EVA is an authorized distributor for Advanced DC Motors.

My version of this song:

“Matchmaker, matchmaker, leave me alone.
I don’t need a mate, I’m fine on my own.”

Today was my sister’s graduation party. It was pleasant enough, and I made my first amaretto sour (which ended up rather tasty.) When the guests started going home, my brother came over to me and said that one of the guests (who is a close friend of the family, but someone I haven’t seen in many years) wanted to say goodbye to me and to come to the deck. I was talking to one of my sister’s friends and I commented, “Oh, she probably wants to set me up with someone.”

So I went over to her and she started in with the, “it was so nice to see you…” thing - and then hit me with, “I know a little guy [meaning young man] who I want to introduce you to…” and proceeded to inform me that this guy is looking for a Polish girl to marry and that she thought of me automatically. She tossed in that he makes a very good living working for a pharmaceutical company… ugh. Yay, big pharma? And, sure, I’m shallow enough to give a shit about whether or not someone is making 5, 6 or 7 figures… that factors highly into my list of criteria. PLEASE NOTE HEALTHY DOSE OF SARCASM.

I didn’t want to insult her or embarrass her, so I told her that he could feel free to email me… and we’ll see. I’m not looking for a relationship, I’m not interested in a relationship, and I will have to be fair and make that clear if he does contact me. It’s just very difficult to explain to a woman who is still fairly recently widowed after 50+ years of happy marriage, who never worked, and whose life was tied up in her husband and children that this isn’t on my list of priorities and that I don’t want marriage and children. Companionship, sure. But “wifehood”? Not in my big picture.

But this guy is looking for a Polish WIFE. That’s GREAT. Some fetishized exemplar of dainty womanhood or “the angel in the house” (as phrased during the Victorian period), but with an Eastern European flavor. Sure, I can cook, but I’m not having dinner on the table every night - or any night, really. I’m not staying home, I’m not having kids, I’m not keeping quiet and playing the dutiful wife. These are the things I consider to be the cultural markers of a Polish wife in the United States - it’s a very “old country” mentality. Additionally, I’m not religious, I’m not even spiritual. Though I can (because I was confirmed as such) get married in a Roman Catholic church, I wouldn’t wish to, if I were ever even to get married. I’m not going to keep my opinions to myself, and I’m not going to “mother” my husband.

My mother and my sister say I’m being too judgmental and not giving this guy a chance. My sister’s friends (all young and romantic and hopeful) said, “He might be your soulmate! What if he’s the love of your life??” HA. They just graduated from college; they’re hopeful about the future and imagine that such things (soulmates, “love of your life” types) exist. Being too judgmental? Maybe so… but anyone who says, “I’m looking for a Polish wife” isn’t going to get very far into conversation with me. It would be like me saying, “I want a Jewish husband because I hear they take very good care of their wives and are good with money,” or “I want a French husband because I hear they are very good in the sack.” It’s a strange sort of racism based on generalities and stereotypes and I don’t dig that.

I think those horrible stereotypes are more widespread about women, though… Italian women have tempers, but they really know how to cook. Polish women know how to cook and be domestic, Asian women are docile and quiet, Irish women are feisty but hard workers, African women are sex-crazed (as opposed to sensual - don’t think I’m saying that having a healthy sex drive is bad… I’m just saying that the stereotype implies some nymphomaniacal tendencies associated with skin pigmentation)… insert other crappy stereotypes here. UGH.

On a more positive note, I spoke with my friend Larry tonight and I have the dates during which I am invited to come visit him at his family’s house down the shore. For those of you not in NJ, this is how we folks in northern New Jersey refer to the areas of the Jersey shore below us… we go “down the shore”… people have homes “down the shore.” It’s a thing we do. There’s a stupid (but frighteningly accurate at times) email forward called “You Know You’re From Jersey When…” that I’m sure all NJ residents have received at one point or another. Here’s a link to the full list, but I’ll paste in the ones that I consider to be very accurate below:

• You know that the only people who call it “Joisey” are from New York (usually The Bronx) or Texas. [True. A real New Jersey accent is nothing like that. It's far more annoying to my ear.]
• You don’t think of citrus when people mention “The Oranges.”
• You know that it’s called “Great Adventure,” not “Six Flags.” [I am guilty of this. We plans trips to go to Great Adventure... not Six Flags Great Adventure and Hurricane Harbor.]
• You know what a “jug handle” is. [It's a crazy exit ramp from the highway that allows traffic to turn and often provides a U-turn. There's even a Wikipedia entry.]
• You know that there are no “beaches” in New Jersey -there’s the shore and you don’t go to the shore, you go “down the Shore”. And when you are there, you’re not “at the shore”, you are “down the Shore”.
• You know how to properly negotiate a Circle. [Known as a Rotary in the rest of the country, I think.]
• You knew that the last item had to do with driving.
• You live within 20 minutes of at least three different malls. [God help me, I do... Willowbrook, Short Hills, Garden State Plaza, Livingston, and even possibly Rockaway if I speed.]
• You can see the Manhattan skyline from some part of your town. [Try from my WINDOW, front yard, back yard, entire drive to work, and I can see the windows of buildings in Manhattan when I'm at work since my office building is right on the Hudson.]
• You’ve never pumped your own gas. [Well, not in my state... because it's illegal. But I have traveled and pumped my own gas in NY, PA, MA, NH, MI (rented car upon arrival there by plane - I didn't drive TO Michigan from NJ) and VT.]

OK. It’s getting close to midnight and I am surprisingly tired - and itchy from mosquito bites. Some genius left the deck door open, so all manner of annoying blood-suckers invaded our home. I have cortisone cream here, though, so I’ll fire that on the worst ones before I go to sleep.

Otherwise, I am torn between playing a video game, watching a movie or reading until bedtime. I sort of feel like I have to make the most of this long weekend and stay up late and be a little irresponsible… and nocturnal, as is my nature. I don’t have any real plans for tomorrow… just calling England. I might go to the Japanese mall in Edgewater to buy some Pocky and other tasties. But I might not. I’m spending Monday with my friend Elizabeth… we might go see a matinee movie and then just hang out being lazy. That sounds pretty good right about now. I wonder if my bank is open on Monday. I should’ve checked that this morning. Oh, well. I have a decent sum of money in my wallet - more than enough to cover a movie and lunch and perhaps even a manicure.

Off I go.

“Manifestation through will. Imagination, concentration, action. Spirit and Matter united. A young man raises a doubly terminated wand in his right hand. The wand is held vertically, a tool for the unification of heaven and earth. His left index finger grounds this duality into creation drawing from the original chaos to bring into being the flowers of creation. His aura is shown as the horizontal figure eight, symbol of eternity, while about his waist is wrapped the serpen-cinture, the serpent devouring its own tail, another symbol of eternity. In front of him are the creator/magicians tools, wands, cups, swords and pentacles, symbolizing fire, water, air and earth.”

I Am

Which tarot card are you?

Uh-huh. OK.