I had a good day. Work was productive, the drive home wasn’t too stressful… had dinner with my friend… then I went to the store to find some shorts and tank tops for vacation attire.

NOTHING fit correctly. I just felt disgusted with myself… and it’s not me, really. It’s one thing to be zaftig and heavier than I’d like to be; it’s another thing when even the clothing in my size is just an expanded version of the clothes made for size 2 chicks. That is to say that they don’t change the overall fit. They just add fabric.

So the pants are cut in the wrong way… they’re loose in the leg and loose in the waist, but tight in the hips… just not good.

It still makes me really sad and upset and angry, though. Whatever. I’ll find something tomorrow or Saturday after the graduation ceremony. I’ll hit up someplace that sells more athletic style clothing; I might find something looser fitting and better suited to my shape right now.

When I have my doctor’s appointment upon my return, I’m going to ask him if there’s any alternative to the medication I’m taking that absolutely does NOT include weight gain as one of the effects. I also need to exercise more regularly and for longer periods of time… I think it’s going to be that sort of rough start where I won’t feel inspired to work out more until I see effects. When I do, I’ll want to do it all the time… but getting there has been really difficult for some reason. Genetics? Medication? I don’t know. Could be both. I’m 28 now, not 23. There’s a difference there, too.

Despite the fact that I still look 14.

My sister is on her way home from a senior class event at her college and we’re going to work on creating her graduation party invitation and list of invitees… something we need to do before we leave the country. And I have to write all the addresses I’ll be needing for sending postcards into my little address book. Details, details. But important ones.